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Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

Hi. My name is Leanne and I've found you guys in the hope that someone may be able to alieviate some anxieties I have or just give me some general advice about moving my 3.5 and 1.5 year old to the Sarlat area. They will be 4 and 2 by the time we move. My eldest is Charlie and although for the most of it, he is sociable, likeable and very polite, like all 3 year old boys in the UK, he comes with his foibles! He can tantrum, have a stinking attitude when he wants and although I consider my partner and I disciplinarians, when he's "on one," I find it incredibly hard to reign him in! Since he was very small, he ALWAYS wakes in the night. Anything from 1-2 hours. He's no bother but on his bad nights, he is understandably shattered the next day which is when he plays up the most.
EVERYTHING I have read implies that French children are completely perfect; tantrum and attitude-free. Therefore being parented by perfect, patient and faultless parents. This is exactly where my anxieties come from. What if his teachers cannot cope with his mood swings? What if he has a bad time settling and expresses this in his emotional outbursts? What if this makes him friendless?! Has anyone had experience of the same thing? Any advice on getting him French-ready? Thanks for reading. I really appreciate it. X
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Re: Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

 Leanne wrote:
EVERYTHING I have read implies that French children are completely perfect; tantrum and attitude-free.

You haven't been reading the right stuff. I've pm'd you

 


I'm not a geek, I am a technically aware early adopter
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Re: Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

I am really not sure how to take this post. Is it a wind up?

And if not a wind up, then I am having trouble imagining where on earth on can find/read such absurdities about french family life.

So, IF this is not a wind up, I would suggest that you start reading french parenting magazines and forums, and you'll see that people are people and no one and nowhere is perfect.



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Re: Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

I'm not sure why you have to be so rude? I am genuinely worried. I am a young mother asking for advice and do not need such comments as, 'is this a wind up?' Because you are making me feel stupid. It is hardly my fault if the literature and articles I have read imply that French children are wildly different to the UK; "Why French kids do not tantrum." "How to educate the perfect child, like the French." "How are you doing it wrong? Ask the French."
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Re: Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

 Leanne wrote:
I'm not sure why you have to be so rude? I am genuinely worried. I am a young mother asking for advice and do not need such comments as, 'is this a wind up?' Because you are making me feel stupid. 


Hi Leanne,

Best thing is to just ignore her. It's the way she is. If you don't do life  her way you're wrong.

Good luck with your research.

cajal

A friend in need's a pest. Get rid.
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Re: Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

You're lovely. Thank you for that. I really appreciate it X

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Re: Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

What you have read is wrong although generally French kids are very well behaved in social environments. It is a cultural thing.

I would not worry about your sons behaviour as the chances are when he goes to school he will become a model student. If he does play up the teachers will manage it. In my experience/kids experience it is the kids that are well behaved at home who are the ones more likely to play up at school.

BUT, I would not worry about schooling but more the fact you are moving to Sarlat with children. Nice as Sarlat is (if you like that type of thing), it is typically a place I would not relocate to with kids. Like it or not, you will get better schooling in France in major towns and cities. Your children will grow up having more things to do, and better choice of colleges, facilities ect. You have to think long term.

I am hoping you have 'credible' employment. When I mean 'credible' I am mean employed on a French CDI contract. If not, schooling is going to be the last of your problems.


ner ner nee ner ner!!
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Re: Advice needed for moving 4 year old boy to the Dordogne, please

 Leanne wrote:
What if his teachers cannot cope with his mood swings? What if he has a bad time settling and expresses this in his emotional outbursts? What if this makes him friendless?!

 

Your généralisations about the behaviour of French children are in general true but that does not mean that they have perfect, patient and faultless parents.

Plenty of French schoolchildren come from very lacking households, luckily the French schools have the tools to do the job and they are not hampered from using them, the word "education" in France means upbringing and applies equally to the home as the school, its the responsability of the education system to make up for any lacking in the latter.

 

Thanks to his schooling your son will very quickly comply and learn to understand and respect boundaries like his peers.

 

After about 2 weeks into the school holidays you start to hear some French children screaming and making tantrums in public, in most cases looking at the parent or parents more often its the grandparents and you realise the value of the childs schooling.


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